Potty time?

I gave a test about congruent triangles in Geometry today. Here's a conversation that happened in the midst of 3rd block:

boy: Ms. Ebberts, can I go to the bathroom?
me: Sure
boy: Uh, can I take my test with me so I don't waste any time?
me (trying to keep a straight face and not laugh at this boy): no

It was really hard not to laugh since all my kids were focused on their test and very quiet and I didn't want to be the distraction. It was equally hard to keep an unemotional face as the boy returned from the restroom a while later.

He was the last student in the class to finish the test.

Never a dull moment

Here's a conversation that occurred between me and several students in my 4th block Geometry class today. Of my 5 classes, they by far have the most personality.

[Girl walks in eating a lemon pastry]

me: you know, I'm not a huge fan of lemon flavored things.
boy #1: WHAT?! Not even Lemon Pledge?!?!
me: well, okay, I'm not a huge fan of lemon things except for Pledge
boy #2: yeah, I like to eat mine with wheat bread
me: hmm, yeah, I'd have to say I prefer to at least spray mine on a wood surface and then lick it off
pastry girl: what are you guys talking about?
me: how we like to eat Lemon Pledge
me: so boy #1, how do you like your Pledge?
boy #1: straight from the can


Later in class, boy #1 challenged me to a dance off. Also, boy #2 has told me he will pay me $15 to sing an entire class period.

I promise, I do teach my kids things.

November 1

boy student: MS. EBBERTS, ARE YOU GOING TO DO 'NO SHAVE NOVEMBER'?!?!?!?!?!

girl student: Yeah, are you? Are gym teacher last year didn't shave her legs and wore shorts everyday. It was disgusting.

me: No, I'm not going to participate

[Now, at this point, the kids are all over the place, the entire class is talking and I am trying to get class started for the day. So I do what I can to get their attention...]

me (saying this in a very serious, get down to business voice): Hey folks, listen, I need your attention. Folks, listen up please.

[Class is now quiet]

me: Listen, I only participate in "Mustache March." So, you can look for my stache then.

Happy November!!

Timekeeper

So, the clock on the wall wasn't working in my room. The teacher who's in there 2nd block (since I share a room) had taken it down when it was my turn to use the room.

3rd block: the lack of clock goes unnoticed.

4th block: cannot stand that there is no clock on the wall. they ask several times about where the clock is, why it's not hanging, what time it is, etc.

I try to explain to the class that it would bug them more to look at a clock that was the wrong time and didn't tick than to have a missing one, but they were persistent.

So I did what any teacher would do: I taped the clock to my lanyard that I keep my keys on and hung it around my neck and proceeded on with the lesson.

They called me Flava Flav for the rest of the hour and said I needed to get a grill. Someone also mentioned that I would look good with viking horns.

quote of the week

This past school week was Homecoming (theme "Coast to Coast"). Each day had a different destination and the staff was encouraged to dress for each. Thursday was "Naples Day" (dress like a retiree). Which to me translated into "Wear Gym Shorts, T-shirt, and Slippers and Get Away With It Day." So I walked around all day in a robe and slippers and what was ultimately my pajamas with a coffee cup full of water. Hands down most comfortable day of school ever.



Former student: Eeebs!! Your legs are pretty white for being a runner.

i gots tape worms

I am a math tutor. So, every 1st block on A-days, I get to help kids with their homework and help them study. It's really stressful, but also really fun, because there are some Calculus students that come in and we get to talk derivatives and what not.
I have my 'regulars.' I look forward to them because they aren't my own, but I've gotten to know them pretty well already over the course of the school year.

Here's a conversation between some of my Algebra 2 boys that come in:

Boy 1: You're a wrestler, you probably get ring worm or a staph infection or something
Boy 2: Nah, man, that's gross.
Me: Well, hey, at least that's better than tape worms, right?
Boy 1: No, I think I got those
Me (laughing): What? You do not have tape worms.
Boy 1: Yes, I do, I seriously think I have tape worms.


Anyway, I find this conversation really funny, because, well, I'm pretty fascinated tape worms. The idea of them are really gross, but I was really curious once in college and I ate one...No, actually, I just did a bit of research on them. Enough about worms.

Week in Review

This week I:

learned the word "Hermbes" (pronounced "herms") means "greatly struggling" and can be used in a phrase such as, "Ms. Ebberts, I'm hermbes-ing right now."

claimed September 14th was "National Cheese Product Day" and that I wore Pancake scented deodorant (and my kids believed me)

ran with a pile of mud on my head.

was chased (and attacked) by former students with shaving cream.

played a dice rolling game where the loser had to take 2 Ex-Lax pills before they went to sleep.